Jury Duty - A Reflection

A few months back I got summons for Grand Jury duty. You know, like on Law and Order; where they tell their case to the Grand Jury to see if they have enough evidence before inditing.

The term of jury service - 3 months. July, August and September.

First things things - the court house I had to go to doesn't have parking or validate. I've served on  jury here once before and I remembered paying for parking before. But then a friend reminded me to bring quarters. Good thing to, the parking lot was converted to one of those "get your ticket here" lots that only took change. I would have had to walk, in the rain; from another further lot if I only had my card on me.

The next thing - I have a hard time believing the people randomly selected to serve on the jury was an accurate cross section of my county. I know where I live is predominately white, as where the people called. I have a hard time believing we the area is that young. Unless they are also pulling from all of the college kids around. And there were far more women than men. And I will come back to this point.

Next let's talk about how we got to sit around extra long this morning in the jury room because so many people failed to show. The court officers were actually discussing calling people to see if they were showing.

We finally get in to the court room and there is a big laugh among the court employees about the judge that was listed to appear, because apparently he is "no longer with us". The judge that did come in seemed pretty cool.

We went through the whole swearing in of the jury, and get the long lecture about it being our civic duty to serve and how it is an inconvenience. Then he goes on about how an inconvenience isn't  hardship; and he's not going to let anyone off for just any old reason.

Next the judge tells us to be thankful that we don't live in the county south of us; as that grand jury meets every day of the week - Monday through Friday. In our county the grand jury only meets on Tuesday and Wednesday; but still for three months. He tells us they need 13 jurors on the panel at all times, but 23 will be sat so that people can be excused for medical and dental appointments, pre-planned vacations, meetings, etc. Honestly, this all sounds very doable.

But here's the thing; the courts system pays $50 a day when you serve and you're not being paid by your employer.

Really? $50 a day. The minimum wage in the state is $10/hour. It's an 8 hour day. And you need to py for your own parking.

My employer, like many; will pay me for 3 days of service.

And the states $50 a day doesn't come close to matching what I would bring in from work.

Anyhow.

My juror number is 53. After about ten rounds of people going up; we were called in threes, but saw the judge alone it's my turn. Not even half of the jury is seated. Two "kids" (they didn't even look 18) were sent to "the back of the line". But people were being excused from service one after another. Of the people that were already seated the vast majority were women - over 50 or under 30. The men that went up; of all ages were being dismissed. Only two men I believe were sat by the time I left.

It's finally my turn to see the judge. He asks me if there is any reason I cannot serve. He put it that plainly and simply. And I told him the simple truth; I was the sole provider for a family of five and my employer would only pay me for three days of service and frankly the $50 a day the court paid would not be sufficient. And just like that I was dismissed.

I truly believe this is why many of the people before me were also excused. I overheard many conversations while waiting from people afraid they couldn't provide for their family if they were called. Or the small business owners who were afraid to loss business.

I would have loved to of served on the grand jury. I think it would have been a very unique and interesting experience.

Yet, here I am. Not serving because there are no laws about paying your employees while serving. Because really, let's think about this - how many people actually do get called and do end up sitting on a grand jury?

And to that affect, how can anyone expect to have their court case heard by a jury of their peers when their peers are the working middle class; who cannot live off $50 a day?

I didn't see how the jury pool looked in the end. But with those over 60 being excused and those that needed to work to provide for a family being excused and the young ones sent to "the back of the line"; in the half of the process I saw I find it hard to believe this is an accurate sampling of the population. And forget the randomness of the process when the system is rigged to have the working middle class excused.

And let me just add that I probably would have been excused if I told the judge I was the primary care provider for three children and that $50 a day would be insufficient to pay for day care.

And mind you, if I did not have a job they would pay me $50 a day anyhow.

This system is seriously flawed.

Tonight

Tonight was a fairly typical Wednesday night. One we haven't had too many of lately with all of the sickness going around.

And let me tell you. Typical - felt good.

As the boys get older, life gets busier. There are just so many things to do, to take care of. And often times we get lost in the shuffle and rush of it all.

But tonight was typical. It did seem to drag on... but that's because I realized too late that I never reset the clock in the living room from daylight savings this past weekend.... and some how lost an hour.

Tonight I took it all in.

I got home from work and ate a tuna sandwich while watching the little boys play on the deck and talked to Husband about his day. Within 15 minutes him and RR were off to scouts. the little boys and I ate some pickles and ERP insisted on a peanut-butter sandwich.

The little boys and I nursed; which these days is more of a play time for them. Gene joked about his "boob milk" tasting like peanut-butter. Then we flipped on YouTube and had a dance party. We danced to everything from Gummi Bears to Hot-Hot-Hot to Skeleton Bones. I danced with them (mama needs to get in more cardio) and twirled them around the living room, tripping over the dog who insisted on being the center of attention. I watched the curls on ERPs hair bounce as he danced. I watched TT try and find a groove or two.

After dance party I took ERP to bed, while TT had his nightly video game time. ERP and I did our nightly routine - he rocks on the chair while I make up the beds and tidy up, then he picks out his jammies and I help him get dressed. He brushes his teeth. Then we find the pacifiers, key-keys he calls them. He typically takes six to 11 to bed with him. Then I carry him so he can turn out the light and we rocked and nurse while I watch a show. Lately, it's been Cooked on Netflix. He tells me he's done by saying "daddy" and I lay him in his crib. Most nights he goes to bed on his own from there.

After I said good-night to ERP I went downstairs and gave TT a 5 minute warning. Once his time was up he decided we should play a game instead of reading, so we played a round of Cootie. It was during this ERP started yelling things I couldn't understand. Eventually TT nor I could take anymore crying and yelling from ERP, so we ended the game early - good thing because I was going to need to role five 6s in a row to finish my Cootie sometime this evening.

I checked the clock...and realized I had lost an hour. Fixed the clock and went to take care of ERP... who just needed more snuggles and nursing. I held him tight as we rocked, his head perfectly on my shoulder, his knees bent and resting on my lap. His sweetness melting into me.

Once I got him down I sent TT to get ready for bed. I tell him to do it "big boy style".... meaning go, use the bathroom, and get dressed on his own. I then went and helped him with his teeth. He, of course, tried stalling.... because that's what TT does at bed time. Tucked him while he was telling me his wasn't "sleepy I'm awake-y".

Then I closed his door and turned out his light... and came to write this post while waiting for RR and Husband to get home.

Oh and let's not forget about the telemarketer that called three times in a row, while ERP was crying and TT and I were playing games that I needed to bitch out. Because no night at home, a nice normal typical night, wouldn't be complete without someone calling me about something I don't want to talk about. Social security in this case.

A Open Letter

Yesterday morning I took off of work. I had to bring ERP to an early appointment and I had told Husband if I had time I wanted to take TT to an art event at the library. I had the time and I took him. He brought along with him his Minecraft sword, won that past weekend at Six Flags.Within 20 minutes of being at the event it was stolen. It wasn't misplaced. It wasn't moved. It was stolen. I've had things stolen from me in the past - my grill, my favorite stroller - but they do not compare to having your child's toy stolen from them. And stolen from a "safe place" - really who steals from the library. THE LIBRARY; which is based on the principle that you can borrow things for free as long as you return them. This item was not borrowed, it was not checked out. And I am mad. No, I am pissed. And this is a letter to those that did.

Hey There Adult,

In case you didn't realize it, but you are suppose to be in charge of your child. Children, especially those between the ages of 2 and 5 - which was the crowd at the art program - require supervision. Sometimes they get into things they shouldn't. And it's our job to stop them. Keep them safe. Stop them from hurting themselves or others. Stop them from taking things that don't belong to them.

Now sure you may not have noticed right away, your child had a "new" sword. After all it was raining yesterday and you may have been in a hurry to get them in the car. But at some point in the last 24 hours you must have noticed that your child was playing with a new toy; that you didn't recall buying or them getting as a gift. And I know kids, having three of them myself; when they get a super cool new toy - one worth stealing over - they are going to play with it. That is unless there are some deeper issues and they are in the habit of stealing things and hiding them away in a secret place. And if that's the case you should keep a better eye on them. 

So maybe it's my fault for letting my child and his toy tempt your child. After all I let him take the sword with him. But you know what? He's four years old and he really likes his toy swords and capes, and Batman mask... and he takes them places. Because they are important to him. They are cool.

And that sword was really cool. After all, he won it. Playing the strongman game at Six Flags and that increases the cool value to him. Plus his brother, he won one as well. So they could play swords together. And his brother is older than him. and in his eyes he is the mecca of cool and to be able to have this sword bond with his brother was a big thing to him. 

And you know what? You took it away. You let your kid walk away with an 18-inch foam sword. 

A sword that was put on a shelf in the activity room in the library... so it WOULD STAY SAFE and clean while my son and twenty other kids made arts and crafts. 

And I swear I saw you or your son take it. Out of the corner of my eye. My mom senses were tingling and all of a sudden I knew there was a problem. I felt it in my bones that the sword was gone. I rushed over to check where we had put it. And sure enough. GONE. I spoke to the librarian; who acted fast on the situation. She talked to all of the junior volunteers, to the parents, she searched the library (which really is not big), checked at the circulation desk, looked outside the library (in the rain). She took her time... her time away from all the other kids at the event to look for this sword. And for that I am forever grateful. But you know, in the end all of those other kids lost out as well. She wasn't able to devote her time to what was going on, rather she was looking for the sword. 

Now I am not saying my kid is perfect or I am the perfect parent. Far from it. but my kids know it is not OK to take something that is not theirs. Should they come home from a friend's or school with something that belong to them be assured there are questions from me. And I know kids can explain away just about everything. And maybe, just maybe you believed that this sword was given to your child by my son. 

But it was all over social media last night. Nearly every board and parenting organization in town shared the post looking for the sword. 

And maybe you've been busy and haven't checked the happenings lately - I get it - we are busy. But I ask you, I plead to you - please just return the sword to the library. 

My mind is scheming with ways to replace it. I can order one similar to it off ebay or maybe someone can make a "quick" trip to Six Flags to get another one. But me replacing it is not the point. If your kid did take it, deal with them how you see fit; but please return the sword.

Stealing from a kid is just not cool. I know accidents happen, but when they do we try to make them right. So, please, make this right. 

Thanks,
A Mom

PS I would hate to think you, the parent or guardian; had any actual involvement in this incident... but you know... the mind wanders.  

Pizza

The other night I sat down and really looked over RR's lunch menu; and I was shocked to see that if he wanted he could be eating pizza THREE days a week for lunch.  That's a lot of pizza!!

I am slightly outraged by this.  Most weeks it is offered twice.  Some weeks only once and some weeks three times.

Not only that, but they offered FOUR different types of pizza.  Which according to RR are all pretty much the same - nasty.  But then again, he is going through an anti-pizza stage.

Whole grain stuffed crust pizza
Pizzeria pizza
Sal's whole wheat pizza
Personal pizza

15 days of school (not counting snow days) in Febraury.  On seven of those days they offered pizza.  That's just about half the month.  Wow!  Factor in a friend's birthday party and one family meal of pizza... I just can't get over it.

What does RR get for school lunch -usually option #3 - cereal bowl with yogurt.  He'll get a hamburger if they are offered (usually once a week), hot dogs, taco salad and or fish sticks.

Seriously People

It's suppose to snow tonight.  Like 100% chance of snow tonight.  I am not happy about this fact, but that is a whole other post for another day....

So, it's going to snow and since I live in a state where snow is a weather phenomena; everyone and their uncle and sister and second-cousin-twice-removed-on-their-mother's-side needs to rush out for bread, milk, canned goods and gas.  It's total pandemonium at the gas station and store right now...

Oh snap (said in the voice of the great Joy Turner) - I live in New England; where it does snow 6 months out of the year.... so what's with all the panic at the gas station....

Anyhow, I digress... after work today I stopped to get gas along with every other person in town, since it's suppose to snow tonight; and like any gas purchase with cash I pull my car up to the pump, get out, go inside and pay for my purchase.  I even swiped my "member's reward card"; maybe some day I will have enough points for a tropical vacation....

I exit the gas station and walk around to the back of my van and there is this lady pumping the gas I just paid for.  And no, she wasn't pumping it into my car.

"Excuse me," I say trying not to sound overly witchy "but that's the gas I just paid for."

"Oh no," she tells me "I just put my credit card into this pump."

"But my car is parked here."

"I was trying to get my gas before you came back out here."

And then the light-bulb flashes in my head "So that's why the cashier was having such a hard time getting this pump started and kept asking me which pump number... this bitch is trying to steal my gas."

Then she proceeds to argue with me about whose gas it is.  Really?  Do you not see my big red mini van parked in front of this here pump.  Pump #2 that I just paid for the gas on.  Really?

In the end she comments well if it is your cash purchase it will stop when we get there since I put in my credit card I should be able to pump all the gas I want.  And you know what... the pump did stop at the dollar amount I did pay for.  Try and steal my gas.  Really???

After she was done she went inside and re-paid for my gas... and smartly waited till I was done pumping to come back out.

Not that I would ever actually do anything, anyone that knows me knows I am all fluff.

Every Year

Every year, for the past 4 years, on this date I have said - WHY????

Why did I sign RR up for the early CCD class?

It's hard enough to get him there for 8am on a regular Sunday, but when you body thinks it's still 7am it's twice as hard.

Yes, he was 15 minutes late today.

15 minutes late for an hour class.

Oh well, at least he made it.

And I am sure next year, I will be asking the same question.

So... you want a job?

It's been a long time since I've had to look for a job.  Nearly 13 years.  That is not to say I haven't toyed around with other offers during that time; but I haven't had to put myself out there.  That being said, I would like to think that my expectations of job candidates are not that far fetched... correct me if I am wrong.

My exceptions  -

1) Send a cover letter with your resume.  Make it look like you care.

2) Do NOT address that cover letter to "Dear Sir".  Do not assume that the person reading your resume is a man.  Believe it or not, but women actually get to hire people in this day and age.  Can you believe it?

3) Take the time to read  who the contact is on the job posting and address the cover letter to that person.

4) Grammar.  Enough said.  OK, sure my grammar on this blog is terrible sometimes (most times).  But you know what? I'm not using this blog to get a job.  Besides I prefer to think of my grammar or lack thereof as "stress of conscience"  writing.

5) Spelling.

6) MS Word, which 99.9% of the resumes I get are submitted in, has functions to check grammar and spelling.  USE them.  Have I made my point yet?

7) And if you are going to use MS Word to write your resume; make it your own.  Do not reuse the qualifications and objectives that MS Word suggests.

8) Do NOT copy and paste qualifications and objectives from another document, and if you insist on doing this at least get rid of the format (font color, font type, text color, text background color) that makes it obvious you copied and pasted.

9) Do NOT say you are "proficient with MS Word" or  have "excellent written communication skills" if any of items 1 through 8 apply to you.  Any of items 1 through 8.

10) Wear a clean tie, dress socks, pressed pants, etc when you go to the interview.

11) Arrive on-time.  Not too early and not too late.  If you are late, call*.

12) Shake hands and look people in the eye.

13) Take off your winter jacket.

14) Bring a copy of your resume with you.  I know you know I have a copy; but what if someone else was to come to the meeting?

15) Research the company you are going to interview at.  Have questions.  Be prepared.

16) Do not mention your new marriage, deceased father, or other emotional baggage more than once.  I understand the need to mention these items when explaining gaps in your work history, but this is not a therapy session.

17) Send a thank you note when the interview is over.  Snail mail is great, but e-mail works too.  That is unless you don't want the job.

18) When you send that thank-you note, but not send it only to the men that interviewed you.  Remember that women that held the phone interview with you and called you in.  She is your future boss.  She will not call you back for a second interview if you offend her on this level.

I really thought I had been off my rocker by expecting these things.  I was starting to wonder if I was a little dated and not-in-the-now by expecting certain things.  But after talking with my boss, who has been hiring people for a lot longer than I have AND talking with our newest employee I realize I am not expecting too much.  This hiring process has been an eye opener for me.  It has taught my a lot about myself and what I expect of myself, and thus in turn I have learned to better "read between the lines".  Sigh... I honestly didn't think hiring someone would be so tough.

* In regards to #10 I was late for my first interview with my company.  I was really late.  I got so lost.  Keep in mind this was before everyone and their grandmother had a cell phone, before GPS, and all that fun jazz and the directions I had gotten where from a German, and his first language was clearly not English.  So I can appreciate being late, but you need to call.  If I was able to find a pay phone back in.... you do the math, then you can pick up your cell and give me a ring.

You Win

That's right Old Man Winter you win.

I understand you want to show up.  I am not happy about; but I have come to accept the fact that you are knocking; err snowing on my front door.

That's right folks I went and braved the attic tonight - the cold, dark attic - complete with mice (hey it's an old house and we live in New England) and got the winter gear out.

As usual we are all set except RR.  He grows too fast sometimes.  New snow pants and snow boots in his future; and I am sure he'll need a new jacket by his birthday in January.

Speaking of birthdays mine is on a Monday this year.  How stinky is that?

(Ha-ha I bet you thought this was going to be a political post based on the title and the timing.)

Old Man Winter

I'm not sure who invited Old Man Winter, but really they should have consulted with me first.

I swear I woke up this morning, at 5:15am - thank you day light savings time (can you hear the sarcasm in that remark) and it was a chilly 17F at the house this morning.

Bbbrrrrrrr.

I can remember many a high school football games on cold wet November days, when the field was frozen and the skies were grey.  But I swear it wasn't this cold this early in November back then.

Granted last year we were digging out feet and feet of snow at this time.  But still.  I swear it wasn't this cold.

Am I whining enough already?

Sure, in the grand scheme of things it being cold in New England in November is pretty typical and not worthy of complaining about.  But I would have liked a warning.

You know a big sign, pulled on the back of a plane that says "Kate - get the winter stuff out of the attic".

Or maybe some flashing neon warning me.

I swear I just put away the boys winter clothes from last year.

Oh well.  End rant... and back to your regularly scheduled blog.

Last Minute

 Just the other day I was complaining about how Christmas was taking over the entire holiday season.  It seems like once Columbus Day rolls around it's open season for Saint Nick and all of his paraphernalia to show up.

This became more apparent earlier this week as I tried to buy RR's Halloween costume.

He had previously picked out this Fade In / Fade Out Phantom costume; which apparently is all the rage this year as every place was selling it - Walmart, Target, Job Lots, Party City, CVS, Walgreens...literally every store we went into they were selling it.

So I figured we had time; every place is selling it.  So here I was with 2 whole weeks before Halloween and I decide it finally time to buy the costume, I didn't want to wait till the last minute you know.

And then I can't find it.  Well I can find it, in a store, if he wore a child XS or an adult XL.  Lucky for me he was right in the middle of those sizes at a child L... which means no costume was to be found.  I spend lunch periods looking and looking.

As I start to run out of hope; I turn to the internet; realizing I have plenty of time to get it shipped to me.  Except no one has his size in stock on-line.  At last I find it at Walmart dot com and they have one is stock at a store by my work; so I swoop in on-line and order it.

This evening I dashed into my not-so-near-to-me Walmart (in the pouring rain) to pick up the costume, where I had to wait in line for 10 minutes behind a lady setting up - you guessed it her Christmas lay-away - in order to get the costume.

Really - this wasn't last minute.

I think Santa just needs to take a chill and let us enjoy one holiday at a time.

Forget the Turkey

Last year, around early November, I was preaching about respecting The Turkey.

You know, thank THANKSGIVING Turkey.  That holiday that happens before the fat man, er Santa, takes over.

I was all about respecting The Turkey and putting off Christmas jazz until after Thanksgiving.

Now don't get me wrong, if you're done with your holiday shopping in July - good for you.  I just don't want to see Christmas being shoved in my face before Thanksgiving.

Well forget that.

I don't want to see Christmas shoved in my face before Halloween.

Respect the Jack-O-Lantern... respect!!!

Seriously.

I went to the store this weekend to pick up some small Halloween odds and ends... mind you it was October  6th.  Well before Halloween; and all of the Halloween goods had already been consolidated to one small section and the Christmas goodies were taking over.

sigh.

Luck of the Draw

I am one of those people that gets called for jury duty religiously.  The person who gets called before their "3 years is up".  The first two times I had jury duty I called the night before and was told I didn't need to report.

The third time I had jury duty, was December 23 and it was snowing and I had to report for service.  We, the jurors, sat around the court house until 10am when the judge came and told us the lawyers and other staff were held up because of the weather and we were dismissed "for the morning" and told to come back right before noon.  I went to McD's had a coffee and went over my Christmas plans.  We reported back, and shortly after noon we were dismissed for the day with a thanks for our service.

The forth time I got called for jury duty was this past February.  I really thought I was going to be able to call in and be told not to report as Husband was called for jury duty the week before and didn't have to report.  I was wrong, I had to report.  And not only did I have to report but I was selected and served on a jury.  The trial lasted the day and when I was out I was thankful that my term of service for over for at least another three years.

Then June rolled around and one afternoon I was checking the mail and pulled out an envelope addressed to me with a return address on it of "Federal Court System, District of Massachusetts".   I remember standing in the street staring at the envelope thinking "what the hell did I do?".  I slowly turned the envelope over, thinking there must be some confusion; and I saw the text through the back of the envelope "Federal Jury Duty Summons".  Really?  WTF?  I didn't even know they summoned people for federal jury duty.  But I was concerned, they had to excuse me as I just served state jury duty.  Apparently not; you need to serve state duty for 5 days in last 3 years to get excused.  Go figure.

Then it got better.  Federal jury duty isn't for one day, or one week, or even for one month.  It's for TWO whole months.  That's right folks, two months.  I've been on-call for jury duty all summer long.  No wonder it feels like I haven't had much of a summer.  Every Friday I have to call and see if I need to report the following week.  I've been calling, every Friday since before July 4; and every week they tell me to call back next week.  Aaaahhhhh!!  I haven't been able to plan anything all summer; because I just don't know what the next week holds for me.

Now work has gotten slow, and every Friday I say a prayer that my number is going to get called; and every Friday (so far) my prayers have gone unanswered.

Sigh... three more weeks left.

Attacked

Things have been pretty quiet lately over here at Two Eggs.  It's not that I don't have anything to blog about, it's just that I don't have the time to write.

So you can imagine my surprise when I checked my e-mail this morning and had notification of a new comment posted on my blog.  I was giddy with excitement.  I love getting comments on my posts; whether they are written here or on Facebook when I provide link-ups.  Comments are wonderful.

Until they are mean.

I know I am not the first person to be attacked on their blog, and I am sure I will not be the last; nor do I expect this is going to be a one time thing (and if it is I am more than OK with that); but it still hurt.

The comment was made on one of my breastfeeding posts.  And there are a lot of those in these pages, that's for sure.

The poster wrote: Wow, funny that ignorant people like you exist. If anyone thought about the thousands of reasons that breast feeding is great for, how the baby could benefit from it, then anything else could wait

Wow.  Is right.  Clearly they didn't read THE ENTIRE post.

Because you know, I am totally ignorant about breastfeeding... like seriously, I've only been breastfeeding this baby for the LAST 16 MONTHS (combine that with the time I breastfeed the older one and that's well over 2 years of experience)... so I couldn't possibly know what I am talking about.  Especially when I talk about MY OWN EXPERIENCES and spend every forth post saying how wonderful breastfeeding is.

So yeah, I deleted the comment.  Because I can.  That's why.  My blog, my ability to censor comments. And compared to other blogs I make it pretty easy to comment.  I don't require you to put in a password or enter a code; nor do I make all posts subject to my approval first.  Although it makes me wonder...

I am sure I should have ridden the high road on this one, and have just deleted the comment and let it go; but for some reason I feel the need to put this out there.

I welcome comments.  I LOVE comments.  And I have no problem with people disagreeing with my opinion, as long as they are respectful.

Water Bed

The other night I wasn't feeling so well, so I filled my water bottle and took it to bed with me.

No, not that kind of water bottle.

The hot water bottle kind; like your grandmother would have had.

I tossed and I turned and I eventually fell asleep with my water bottle close against me.

Fast forward to around 1am.  I wake up soaking wet.  Like I had taken a bath in my PJs.  The sheets were wet, the mattress with wet.  Everything was wet.  Apparently my hot water bottle strung a leak.  All over me and the bed.

Thankfully we have a king size bed, so Husband was spared the mess.

Un-thankfully, Husband was sleeping with his friend Ambien, so he was of little help cleaning up the mess. (But in his defense he did clean up the mess of my mess then next day.)

So I stumble around, get changed, move the flat sheet and put a towel on top of the fitted sheet, and try to get comfy.  Only to realize the mattress is so wet I can feel it through the towel... four bath towels piled up later I finally drift off to sleep... who knew a hot water bottle held so much liquid?  Who knew I was ushc a deep sleeper at time?

The Sad State of The States

Sad, isn't it?

If you haven't already read this blog post and acted on behalf of the women in your life, and your family's behalf I urge you to.

US and Maternity Leave

I'm sure you've seen it; the cover of the Time Magazine that came out last week.

The cover went viral and was all over the internet; and being discussed in just about every mom-forum I am in.

I've said my mind about the cover; and I'm not going to get into that here.  Really, it is over and done with, and plenty of puns and "responses" to Time have been posted since this first came out.

What I'm writing about today is a call to action in regards to what is really wrong with being a US citizen and a mom.  I read this fantastic article on Moms in Maine entitled: Wake Up Moms - You're Fighting the Wrong Fight; and I couldn't agree more.   Go on read it now... I'll wait....

I have signed the petition and I urge you to do the same (if you agree) and to pass on link of the petition to your friends, family and co-workers.  I plan on writing a letter to my Congressman and Representative as well (as soon as I find the time).  Lastly, while you are at it, I recommend checking out Mom's Rising - and their call to work on improving the maternity leave situation in the US.

This isn't a "women's issue", this is a US family issue - this is something that affects us, as a nation, to the core.  It affects the entire family unit; men, women and children.  The issue isn't whether or not women should work once they have children, but rather supporting women IN their work.  I feel that my breastfeeding relationship with the baby was helped because of my employer and their maternity leave policy; which greatly improved from the Big Boy to the Baby (12 weeks versus 6 weeks, plus working from home part-time).

Having a child isn't a disability, and it is sad that many companies cover maternity leave as a disability.  This is a life changing event, and should be treated as such.  If every other industrialized nation can find a way to support women (and men alike, many countries offer paternity leave) I should think the US should be able to as well.  So let's lend our voices to this conversation and let our representatives in government know maternity leave is a right for ourselves, our wives, our sisters, and our daughters.

Blue Shirted Man

To the Man in the Blue Shirt,

If  we were not in a House of God on Saturday I would have given you a piece of my mind in person, but since I consider myself to be a decent and kind person I am going to do it here instead.  Granted the chances of you reading these are slim to none, but still it needs to be said.

You're child was NOT the only child making their First Communion on Saturday.  This may come as a shock to you, but there were 32 children in the 1pm ceremony.  Which means at least 30 of them where not yours.

Also when a religious official lays out rules to govern certain religious functions, say the one about no video taping or photos during the ceremony; it would behoove you to listen to them.

Furthermore, you were seated in just about the center of the church; so your standing to video tape your child during the singing of Ave Maria blocked the view of around 200 people, myself included.

I do not think you could have possibly been more inconsiderate.  Maybe you didn't want to spend the $15 and purchase the DVD of the service so that you could watch your angle singing over and over again - I get that.  But what I do not get is your need to be so blatantly rude to everyone around you.

I hope you ARE a member of my Parrish, as I know Monsignor does not take kindly to rudeness and disrespect, and you get a well deserved earful.

Sincerely,

The Women Seated Directly 2 Rows Behind You

An Hour

I don't live in Arizona.  Right about now I wish I did.

What's so great about Arizona?  Aside from a few friends that live out there - they don't participate in the foolishness of daylight savings time.

The week before DST friends all over Facebook where cooing about how they couldn't wait "for the extra hour of light in the evenings".  Bah humbug.

A few of them grumbled the day after about feeling tired and worn down the next day.

It's been nearly a week and I still feel tired and worn down.

I am a morning person (feel free to cuss at me under your breath) and I love my sunlight in the morning.  With the time change I feel like I have been pulled back into the dark days of winter.  I really dislike getting up while it's still dark out; and while I am mentally awake it is hard to physically pull myself out of bed.  I've been running late nearly every morning this week, and I don't like that.

Add into that a baby that has decided to start nursing again at 3am, mid way through my nights sleep; and it's a recipe for one very tired lady.  I think he's feeling the time change as well, because he doesn't seem to want our standard 10pm nursing session; and then wakes up famished at 3am.

The last couple of days I have felt the fatigue through out my body.  It's the kind of sleep that makes you want to pull a blanket up over your head and close your eyes at noon (and every other hour of the day).

But then when bedtime hits - whamoo; my internal clock is still feeling it as an hour earlier and I'm up later than I should be.

I would say DST is for the birds, but they have no use for clocks; sigh.

Apparently my sleepiness is getting to be very obvious as co-workers are telling me how much I am yawning today.

Long White Tie

Last night I went to the parent's meeting for Turkey's 1st Holy Communion coming in May.  After we reviewed the spiritual side of the process we got down to the nitty gritty schedules, rehearsals (there are two of them) and dress code for the day.

The girls half of the dress code took up more than half the page, with over a paragraph dedicated to the need for girls to dress modestly.  Which, in my opinion, is very understandable in this day and age seeing the way some of Turkey's classmates dress in warmer weather.

The boys dress code called for dark trousers, dark dress socks (no white socks), dark dress shoes (no sneakers), long sleeve white shirt and a white long tie, no-clips ons (bow-ties are also not allowed... good thing he's bed bud E isn't in his class).

I was bummed.  Husband and I had been planning on buying him his first suit. We saw this as a right of passage for a boy his age; and we were looking forward to it.  No I suppose I could still buy him a suit, but really what is the point; by the time he has a chance to wear it again he'll be too big for it anyhow... but this is the boy that wanted a tuxedo to wear the house and to school this time last year.

So now I've started the search for the perfect white tie; as this seems to be the only "out of the ordinary" item of clothing he'll need for the day.

Now if we had a little girl we'd be looking for that special dress and veil and sweater and what have you.  OK, sure I'd end up having to spend a lot more money; but really where is the fun in buying a white tie?

And it's always been this way.  Any mother of a boy can tell you clothing selections are far more limited for boys than girls.  Don't have a son, next time you are shopping just compare the boys clothing area to the size of the girls clothing area and you'll get my drift.

Oh well.... it's not like we can take pictures inside the church anyhow.  Yes, relatives you read that right, no photos IN the church.  Sigh....

You Suck

That comment would be directed at my new insurance company, United HealthCare Oxford.

I take the mini pill, the recommended oral contraception while breastfeeding.  I take a generic.  Sometimes CVS gives me Heather, sometimes it's called Camila.  Same difference.  Under my old insurance it was a $10 co-pay.  With my new insurance I was expecting a $15 co-pay, as our co-pays went up.

So imagine my suprise when I go to get it and they tell me it's $35.99.

I decline to pick-up my prescription, at the price, figuring there must be some computer error.

I call the pharmacy line, enter my 15 digit member ID number more times than I can count... only to get told it's a Tier 3 drug under our new plan... and I have to meet a $100 deductible, then I can pay a $40 co-pay... or just buy it out of pocket for less.

Seriously.

So they recommend a different brand of the mini-pill (Miconor)... because apparently they know better than my doctor.  Who, by the way, I know need to call and ask for a medication change... because the pharmacy can't make the substitution.  You've got to be kidding me!!!

Note: our Rx's are covered by a 3rd party... who also sucks... but I still blame United for picking these jerks to work with.